Leave it
In my family, you have a dog. Except for my sister, who has a cat, probably for the same reason I didn't have a dog before. Give her time.
So I have a dog. It was only a matter of time (and yes, I was an extreme late bloomer).
My dog is not one of those modern breeds sensitive to inbreeding, I suppose. She is of unplanned origins (it's one of those "oh shit my dog is pregnant, you're getting one of the puppies" things). Nothing designer about her, and although the dog equivalent of 23andme had a field day on her littermate and came up with a long list of ingredients, there is nothing labra nor doodle in her. Pretty much everything else, though. Quite a bit of German shepherd, and something with short legs. And something black, even though neither of her parents was. My dog was born "off the grid" in the mountains, in a similarly laissez-faire way as how she was conceived: her birth was discovered one freezing December morning as "oh wow the puppies are here."
She didn't stay in the mountains long; in fact, most of her blind-and-helpless time was in the most expensive zip code in America (together with her entire family of four adult dogs and six other puppies, which gave the neighbors and animal control a field day). My puppy had all the advantages and disadvantages of being a first-time dog, once she came to live with me. I was super paranoid about everything that could go wrong, so I spent a fortune on everything a puppy is supposed to need (and yes, I realize the people who tell us these needs have a conflict of interest). Other than toys (which rarely stay intact for more than an hour) and routine vet care ("yup, still a dog"), that was socialization and puppy classes.
Puppy class was interesting (that's a polite way of saying "difficult"). My puppy's only exposure to other dogs early on was through her indifferent mom ("oh, your eyes are open, I guess you no longer need to nurse anymore") and through play with her part-pit, part-shepherd, almost-feral litter mates, which seemed to involve a lot of what non-experts would call fighting. Luckily, she had also spent two weeks with an amazing trainer, who had socialized her much better than me putting her in my shopping cart at Costco. But when she came to puppy class and saw other dogs, she reverted to her origins, canis lupus. This did not go over so well with most of the other attendees -- in my area, typically a young couple driving a Tesla who think raising a puppy is like curling, trying to sweep every microscopic obstacle out of the way before Luna or Bella trips over it. Ironically, the real curling dog-owner ended up being me, because during "free play" I spent most of my time trying to keep her from eating the other dogs. My pre-class natural techniques involved yelling "No!!" or variants like "Uh uh," or just her name, really loudly. The main thing I learned in class was that treats work much better than holding her on a short leash or yelling or just grabbing her. She now listens really well, and is, as the various dog sites tell you, eager to learn and eager to please. And when she is playing with other dogs, she is simply high energy.
My dog has a simple list of her favorite things:
- Playing with other dogs
- Eating
- Not being alone
- Ripping apart her favorite toys
- Playing tug of war
- Playing fetch
She has a particular way of playing fetch. She tells me she really wants to play by bringing the ball to me over and over until I relent and go play. Then I throw the ball, and she is really good at running after it and getting it, and bringing it all the way back to me. And then she turns it into a standoff:
- "Leave it"
- Glares at me, while holding the ball.
- I do what you're supposed to do, ignore her until she drops the ball.
- She drops the ball on my feet.
- I reach for it, and she picks it up again, and glares at me.
[repeat]
I have of course googled this, and it seems this is normal, playful dog behavior: you created a challenge for me, I figured it out, now I create a challenge for you - see if you can get it. There is a wide range of advice about how to fix this; in case you have ever googled any medical problem, you have a sense of the wide range of plausibility of the advice. Apparently, my leading options are:
- Do exactly as I have been doing
- Trade the ball for a treat, while saying "Leave it" or "Drop it" or whatever your word is
- Throw a second ball -- she will drop the first one
- Trade the ball for another toy
Pedantic me wants to teach her to do it my way, so I keep trying to get her to drop it. Maybe she didn't hear me, and if I say it louder or repeat it, she will understand:
- "Leave it"
- Glares at me, while holding the ball.
- "LEAVE IT!"
- Glares at me, while holding the ball.
- I give up; We both just want to play the damn game.
- I grab her and take the ball out of her mouth.
- She starts to run towards where I previously threw the ball before I even lift my arm.
- I throw the ball, she is delighted, dashes after it, brings it back, glares at me while holding the ball.
[repeat]